Golddigging vs. Standards

It's 2010 ladies and gentlemen, and the word golddigger is thrown around so loosely any woman wanting a pot to piss in and a window to throw it out of is handcuffed, taken to the plank, and called a "golddigger!", right before she's tossed off to her death. Ok, maybe it does not go THAT far, but goldddigger is a term that I find incredibly misunderstood and inaccurate for a number of reasons.

First of all, I am 100% convinced that the word golddigger was invented by a man. Why wouldn't it be? Do you think a woman would create a word so offensive when she desires a man to be....oh how do I word it...oh yeah, a man. It seems when a woman desires a man who actually acts like one; a provider, father, and leader, and of course somewhat financial stable, she is demeaned, looked down upon, and cursed as if she's asking for too much.

Growing up with a dad in my home, I am nothing short of a daddy's girl. I am the epitome of a spoiled brat, and that is something I am working on. I am a work in progress! Being born in the Woodland Projects in Cleveland,Ohio to a two family house, to the infamous East Cleveland, to the Leave it to Beaver gated community of the good ole` burbs, all glory to God I have never experienced lack. Through all the struggles my parents endured, I never knew about the likes of one. My needs were always met, regardless of what the world attempted to break us down. My father is the epitome of what you would call a MAN. A man's man. He's a big brother, that crazy uncle, the coolest male friend, and the strict father all balled up into one. So I know what it is like to be taken good cared of. I am used to greatness. I am accustomed to having more than enough; I know that blessings literally stalk me. I enjoy the finer things out of life, why else would God give me expensive taste?

But the difference between a golddigger and a woman of my caliber is that I have my own. Thanks to God, I have my own car, own house, educated by the best schools money can buy, and the mind and relationship with Christ to endure it all, and continue towards success. 50 Cent said it best, "It don't matter if I leave her, she got her own Visa." A golddigger is 100% dependent on what her "sponsor" (oh, thanks Teiarra Mari) gives her. She does not have her own, so in order to maintain a lifestyle, said golddigger is always salivating on all fours (both literally and physically) for her next sponsor, or as I like to call them, pimps.

Read this excerpt from a recent interview with Diamond, I mean, LisaRaye McCoy from Black Men's Magazine on her alleged gold digging tendencies.

"The perception that they have of me-I could give a damn about. I dug for gold in highschool. I'm a platinum girl now. I'm an international person now. I don't even like taking out the trash. I don't dig for anything. I don't have a garden either. Every relationship that you embark on is some kind of business relationship. You have to protect yourself... So you better look for someone that's going somewhere who's trying to take you with them."

I actually agree with what she is saying...not so much the trash part but the point that she made is well taken and validated. Should we NOT be looking for a man who gots it going on, just as equally as we got it going on? Why is that frowned upon? Why are we quick to be judged by the ugly term golddigger because we want some type of stability in our relationships? Since when was it ok to be homeless, or living paycheck to paycheck?

Money is NOT everything. It will not buy you love, happiness, or whatever else you think you need to be a whole person. But money is needed to survive. You need money for just the basics out of life, why are women criticized for having standards? You can work at UPS, you don't have to own it. I am sure that about 70% of women in general would be content with a man who does not make six figures, I sure am. I am also content with a man who may be making less than I am. It is more so about a man's motivation to be somewhere, to go somewhere. I am ok with you working entry level at your marketing firm, but a driven man with set goals, self-made, and determined to have a better life is so sexy and attractive. Men it is not about your bank acoount, but about your ambition. Do you have any? Are you satisfied living in your mothers basement? If so, than you are certainly not the man for me, does that make me a golddigger?

Does it make a woman a golddigger if she wants her man to be equally, or at least somewhat equally yoked to her? Does it make a woman a golddigger if she desires a man with potential, than a guy who is A-OK with a $10.00 hour job? The term golddigging is nothing less than a man's excuse for irresponsibility. An excuse for selfishness, an excuse for tit for tat. Why can't a woman have standards? Especially a woman who knows her worth, a woman of virtue, a Proverbs 31 woman. Why should she settle for a Big Mac when she can have Hyde Park's Steakhouse? If having standards, and wanting a man to be financially stable enough to when and if you are in a bind, and may need temporary financial assistant is capable of helping, instead of us both looking at each other dumb, then yes, I am digging, digging, digging, for gold. Love pays not nan bill. Not many women get married to a man who does not have a job, or who is at least not looking for one, hence the word motivation. A man is naturally born a provider and a protector. Why at the slightest gasp some men flee these responsibilites, grasping at the term golddigging as an excuse for chilvary.

Your worth requires it, he'll admire it and he'll see you are priceless. As long as you have your own, dig, girls, dig!

Thoughts?