Racism Alive and Well in 2010?!

Read This Invitation To The “Compton Cook Out,” Held at UC San Diego February 2010 As Posted On Facebook:

“February marks a very important month in American society. No, i’m not referring to Valentines day or Presidents day. I’m talking about Black History month. As a time to celebrate and in hopes of showing respect, the Regents community cordially invites you to its very first Compton Cookout.

For guys: I expect all males to be rockin Jersey’s, stuntin’ up in ya White T (XXXL smallest size acceptable), anything FUBU, Ecko, Rockawear, High/low top Jordans or Dunks, Chains, Jorts, stunner shades, 59 50 hats, Tats, etc.

For girls: For those of you who are unfamiliar with ghetto chicks-Ghetto chicks usually have gold teeth, start fights and drama, and wear cheap clothes – they consider Baby Phat to be high class and expensive couture. They also have short, nappy hair, and usually wear cheap weave, usually in bad colors, such as purple or bright red. They look and act similar to Shenaynay, and speak very loudly, while rolling their neck, and waving their finger in your face. Ghetto chicks have a very limited vocabulary, and attempt to make up for it, by forming new words, such as “constipulated”, or simply cursing persistently, or using other types of vulgarities, and making noises, such as “hmmg!”, or smacking their lips, and making other angry noises,grunts, and faces. The objective is for all you lovely ladies to look, act, and essentially take on these “respectable” qualities throughout the day.

Several of the regents condos will be teaming up to house this monstrosity, so travel house to house and experience the various elements of life in the ghetto.

We will be serving 40’s, Kegs of Natty, dat Purple Drank- which consists of sugar, water, and the color purple , chicken, coolade, and of course Watermelon. So come one and come all, make ya self before we break ya self, keep strapped, get yo shine on, and join us for a day party to be remembered- or not."

WOWWWWWWWWWW!!!! Are you serious? When I first read this, tears came to my eyes. Is this really how we are portrayed? Is this how the white race REALLY views us; behind our backs, behind closed doors, is the N word spoken rampantly? I dont know why this weighed so heavily on my heart, especially the extremely offensive and sad description of the "ghetto chick" and how she dresses. The question is, who is really to blame? I dont think we have to look very far for the answer. Just turn on the tube, and the absence of successful African American sitcoms speaks volumes. The so-called "reality" shows portray the stereotypes of African Americans *coughs* (Real Housewives of Atlanta) *coughs*. BET is consumed with hip-hop videos portraying the description above perfectly. The women in these videos shaking what they mama's gave them dont help either. The Madea's, Shenaynay's, and Wanda's are fun and entertaining, but to a white woman in the good ole' country side of Iowa, these images are all they see of a black person.

Is there ever a point where entertainment takes it too far? Should entertainment be confined to "free speech" ,regardless of the images portrayed and the stereotypes enforced? When does entertainment and the entertainers become responsible for there actions? Or do they even have a responsibility? Do they even care?!

A few San Diego college students ignorant and mistaken views on my beautiful honey skin should not have this effect on me, but it does. This invitation was nothing short of stupidity, and offensive in the least, ESPECIALLY during Black History Month, where the powerful and under rated history of African Americans are actually celebrated and taught (unlike the History books in grammar schools all across America). Some suggest throw a "Trailer Trash" party, where the girls where cut off tank tops, wear dry, stringy blonde wigs, dirty sandals and cut-off denim shorts with a couple Coronas, and the men come dressed in cowboys hats, fitted light jeans, plaid shirts, and their sexual partner in tow, who just happens to also be their first cousin. Or some suggest, Yeah, let them have their party, but let them have it actually in Compton, then let's sit back and enjoy the festivities (pass the popcorn please...oh yeah and the police! Lol).

Now, this is not a dog at white people. It is actually a wake up call! The Black race is the only race where when one person does something, it is automatically boomeranged to the whole entire race. One disappointing Black athlete, and all of a sudden it's all Black athletes. We are the only race where what one person does, another person of the same color across the country can be discriminated against as a result. The media, entertainers, and the everyday working Joe's need to take responsibility for their actions and do better. This is not about a offensive party, it's about our distorted image that WE ourselves are portraying. For some reason, Lil' Wayne, Nicki Minaj and all the gold tooth toting, donkey butt carrying, different color weave wearing celebrities come to mind.

Racism is alive and well, even in the decade of 2010! My father, Marvin Wilson was alive when Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. was fighting for equal rights for African Americans! Do you realize that that was NOT that long ago? Your parents, or at the least grandparents was alive when we were STILL fighting for equal rights! That is so amazing to me! My great grandmother and sisters lived in Jackson, Mississippi still fighting just to keep their lives! My grandmother and her sisters was the first generation of my family that settled in the northern states of Illinois, Ohio and Indiana.

So when you think about it, 1968, the year of MLK Jr.'s death is not a distant memory. Which makes it scarier than ever. Has any progress been made...at all?

The Aftermath of Valentines Day

Valentine's Day can be the most happiest, joyfulest (is that even a word), wonderfulest holiday for a woman, or the exact opposite, one of lonliness, confusion, and cold stone bitterness. :( In my humble opinion, Valentines Day is what you make it! I have come to a point in my life that my joy is not dependent on anyone, not a man, friend, shoe or bag...(ok, maybe new shoes, but I digress...). My hope is in God, my very bestest Valentine who is the best Valentine a girl could ever have. That's why I believe V-Day landed on a Sunday; on the Sabbath, for all of us to enjoy the one who TRULY loves us the most. When you think about it, is there really even a comparison? Shoot, forget roses, my Valentine CREATED the roses! My Valentine spoke the color of the roses, and it was. Red, pink ,white? Take your pick! Forget a sunrise, my God CREATED the sun, told it when to rise and when to set!

With God, the perfect Valentine, I never have to worry if He'll leave me, or if I could trust Him. With God, He loves me unconditionally, flaws and all. He loves everything about me, despite my sometimes trippy attitude, occasional pity parties of 1 and my ungratefullness. He is my Valentine when it's not even Valentines Day!

If you didn't have anyone to take you out, take yo' self out! What you waiting for a man to do it fo'? If no one bought you roses, I hoped you bought yourself some. I hope you took care of yourself, like I did. I hope you treated yourself, and learned to love the company of YOU more than anybody else. I hope your happiness wasn't depended on a cheap dinner and a washed up movie. I hope you recognized your worth, and realized it more than ever that God is all that you need. He has you right where He wants you. He loves you so much, and I thank God that as much as I am in love with Him, He's in love with me!

I had the BESTESTESTEST Valentines weekend, one that no couples could have compared. Check mate.

Everything is in Perfect Order

This is such a beautiful painting that I had to share it. Everyday I notice how even the slightest thing is happens, does not happen the perfect way it should or shouldn't. With God, there is no such thing as a coincidence. Nothing is by chance, or luck, or a rabbits foot. But my grace and God's favor. Everything about us is perfectly molded, just the way God intended. No mistakes, no blemishes, no mishaps, only perfection in the making. I am a child of God, a woman with a supernatural advantage. A woman who God's favor is upon. Daily He's molding me, teaching me, guiding me, loving me, flaws and all, drawing me closer to Him. Allow God to mold you. Some things may need stripped from our lives, and it's probably something we do not want to let go. Allow God to work in your life like He has now, He will never let you down.

Definition of a Hater

Okay folks, it is 2010, not only a new year but a new decade, old things of the past is gone, and the word "Hater" should be one of the those words that should banned from the English language, or at least the Black community. It is the most abused, overused word I know. I am taking to my blog to define what exactly the word "Hater" means, and what makes a person one.

In my humble opinion, being a "Hater" is nothing but a state of mind. Anyone can be a hater, at any time, at any place, regardless of circumstance or position, because there will always be someone who has more than you, is more attractive, has a better body, job, (insert whatever else here) than you do. I believe everyone has been a hater at some point in there lives, the vital difference is simply the length of time. I, too, ladies have been a hater, I recognized it in myself, and I checked myself immediately, because hating is not attractive, it is not cute, and no one likes a envious person.

A lot of people get the word "Hater" and verbally expressing their personal opinion often confused. A professed fan of Black entertainment blogs, the comments left by the commentators are hilarious, and sad all at the same time. The word "Hater" is splattered around on every other commenters post like nothing. So let me give you an example of a hater to distinguish between opinion vs. hating.

While enjoying a fun Saturday night out with your girls in the club, you see a woman walk in looking a hot mess. You know the kind, bad weave, chipped polish, equipped with the cheap, shiny plastic shoes and clutch, and red and purple ensemble. Now, even though you wouldn't dare step out of the house dressed in such a way (lol), you arrogantly tell your girlfriend, "Girrllll, look at her shoes, she think she cute in those Payless, BOGO shoes! (Insert laugh here).

Would you consider this woman to be a hater? I do. She is a hater, simply because this woman, whom she does not know, made such a great impact on her that she not only thought about her bad outfit choices after she walked by, lingered on it, put it into words, told her girlfriend about it. What business is it of yours to comment on another womans outfit? Why do you care so much that you had to take time out of your life to comment about her? It shouldnt be that much of importance for you. You should be so focused on yourself and having a good time that you don't even have time, or the energy for negativity.

Another example, Beyonce is not hating on my bank account. Remember, a person who has more or better than you is not hating on you (for that reason, of course). Now, Beyonce may hate on my relationship with God, the fact that I have privacy and not in the public spotlight, or the fact that I was able to go to my highschool Prom, date and have fun like a regular gal, but my checking account I'm sure she is not envious of. So the next time you are tempted to say someone is hating on you, see if their driving a 2010 Lexus and your on the bus. A person living in a mansion and your leasing an apartment, they are probably not hating on your apartment space. Usually a person don't hate on a downgrade.

YES, there are haters in this world. People who are rejoice at your downfall, joyful that you did not receive a blessing, or angered at the fact of your favor. They do exist, ladies and gents, and sometimes there closer to you than you'd expect. Hate is internal. Sometimes people dont hate on you, but on what you have. They lack, so therefore they want others to lack as well. Misery always love company. "Haters" are not happy or content with what they have, and they are miserable at people who do have. Hating is not if a person doesn't like your shirt, or if Beyonce isn't there favorite artist. People can have opinions, and if their unlike yours they are not always haters. Haters are miserable, secretly depressed, joy-deprived individuals, making negativity jealous.

We all long for more, for greatness and the pursuit of happiness, and along the way we may think the grass is greener on the other side. Sometimes it is, and sometimes it isn't, but is it worth finding out? Thankyou Jesus for contentment, for I am satisifed where I am, but never complacent. Hating takes too much energy, takes too much of my time. I'm so focused throughout my day that after I finish minding my own business it's time to go to bed!

Recognize any triggers within yourself that may set off your hater alarm. It is normal, especially as women, it is natural for us to compete and be "better than" and to "outdo". But when you acknowledge it, subdue it and improve it, you wont be a hater, but you'll have them. And your nobody until somebody hates you...right?